How Embarrassing !

How embarrassing that I haven't posted ANYTHING in almost 3 months ! Yikes ! Has that much time possibly gone by ?

Just for the sport of publicly saying how sorry I am , I'll throw out some completely EMBARRASSING stories on myself ... just to bring total humility to the table and then I'll get back to posting often and with photos again. A long one (but hang in there ...it's embarrassing) and then a short one and one super quick one !

EMBARRASSING story #1: David and I went to a local hotel in the city for a Sat. morning date. We were going to have breakfast together and then hang out and swim for a couple of hours...no big deal right? The ONLY thing that I had to do is to switch from breakfast clothes to swimsuit..WELL,.... I headed up to the locker room for my quick switch and noticed at the front of the entrance that there were boxes and "tools".. I thought,... strange... but kept on going... a little sheet rock dust was wafting in the air..is that a saw that I hear? bizarre. But starry date eyed me went through the doors and out popped (seriously) a MAN from the showers ! Relax, I saw nothing... he had heard me coming and popped out his head from behind the divider wall to say in Spanish that he was so sorry. The locker room was under remodeling and he would walk me out...NO NO NO ...no necicito senor ! gracias ! OH MY !!! should have read the sign that was probably posted at the bottom of the stairs...yikes ! My first thought, as I was dying laughing inside, was ...wow! I'm finally feeling culturally adapted because it was funny instead of violating that a man was naked and in the girls locker room... I'm sure that he had no water or shower in his home and hey... i'd jump in there too if I were him ..covered in sheet rock dust... yep! I'd have done the same thing... THIS GETS BETTER..keep reading ! So, I go to the registry office to let them know that men are in the locker room and I need to change for the pool. Where should I go? He hands me a room key looking thing and points with AMAZINGLY rapid Spanish. I nod in total assurance that I COMPLETELY understood what the card was for and walk in the direction of his finger realizing that the direction was the ONLY thing I was sure of ...what in the world is this card for ... I check out the first restroom..no place for a card ...I found an employee who was cleaning the bathroom and asked what this is for... noticing my pearly WHITE skin , she didn't even try Spanish but took me by the hand and pulls me down the hall ( very politely) to the elevator and POINTS inside... OH, I go in there ? .. so, dumb me did... at this point, I'm beginning to wonder if more coffee and conversation would be just as good as sun and water with mi esposo? hmmm.. once on the elevator I take advantage of another WHITE skinned person assuming that she spoke English (notice the HUGE amount of assuming that is going on in this story..hmm) She did speak English.. we compared cards and yes ! this was surely a room key... my word ! They are sending me to a ROOM !!!! I really don't know about things now. At this point David is FAR from me and I don't know what else to do but push through my situation. The elevator stops and opens and I think I had my eyes squeezed shut in fear to what I might see ...yep, just as bad... it was a floor being renovated...naked men? ...possibly...serial killers? ...possibly... Dumb me... I braced myself and kept going....it was almost as scary to turn around. There surely must be someone following me...at least a goofy tv show saying I was on camera..this doesn't really happen to people. I went to my numbered room on the card, popped it in..light turned green, opened the door and ALL of the furniture was covered in white sheets ! I threw the locks on the door and pushed every piece of furniture against the doors, jumped in the shower. I was so scared that I decided to scrap the rule to shower before entering the pool and throw my suit on... I jumped out of the shower and NAILED my rear end on the shower edge, jumped up and threw my clothes on , asked the Lord to forgive me if I killed someone if they walked in or popped out of somewhere and SCRAMMED..... once I met up with David again, I was laughing sooooo hard that I think I added 10 years BACK to my life.. it is so good for me to laugh at myself and in this culture I pretty much am doing it daily ! ...... lesson : read ALL sign when in a foreign country and assumptions can lead to sore rear ends !

EMBARRASSING story #2... David and I needed to quickly shoot into a copy store.. photo copy some things before David needed to catch a plane for the states ... we were in a hurry to say the least. We pull into a shopping center, I glance around, thinking that I've found a copy stored based on two familiar words in the sign..laser and copier.. I dodge in , CERTAIN that they can photocopy Dave's work... When I approach the desk she tosses me a laminated sheet of paper. I am giving her my professional , self assured look of yes, I speak Spanish and it is a pleasure to be in your business space today..glance down and notice that she has given me a sheet of MANY naked people !!!!!! WOAH

Embarrassing #3 .. We were having Internet installed FINALLY after not having it recently for 2 months (hence, the partial reason for not blogging) . The company has a HORRIBLE reputation for taking forever and so when they phoned to say that they were on their way... I was beyond EXCITED!!! I answered the phone and the man said, "is this the home of David Evans ? (meaning to say yes, this is his wife ) I practically screamed... YES! this is YOUR WIFE!!!! Grayson about croaked ! MOM!! You just told that man that you were HIS wife ! .....lesson : breathing and thinking will ALWAYS be one of the most important things we do .... especially in that order and when done BEFORE speaking !

Wishing you all a day filled with much joy and the pleasure of learning to laugh at ourselves.. ,
m in guate !